Lauren Conrad out and about in L.A. (11/10)

Lauren Conrad made a scene at JFK airport last week when she was  *gasp* paged by her real name over the public address system! Oh noes! From the New York Post:

The pretty cast member of “The Hills” was in JFK airport last week, en route to LA, when an airline attendant paged her on the public address system to go to the ticket counter and pick up her standby ticket. A spy said, “LC pitched a fit, and was almost driven to tears because she thought people would start talking to her and bothering her. But no one even cared.” (Source)

The best part about this story is not that Lauren isn’t as famous as she thinks she is. The best part is that she has to buy her plane tickets on standby. I guess her clothing line is doing as poorly as we were led to believe. If Lauren doesn’t want to be embarrassed again in an airport, she should just do what most A-list celebrities do. Use a pseudonym. My suggestion: Airhead McDouchebag.

[BauerGriffinOnline]

Spencer Pratt voting in L.A. (11/4)

Can’t these two have any private moments? Jesus Christ, everything is a damn photo op. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw pics of Heidi at the OB/GYN with her feet in stirrups, making out with Spencer. “Doctor, can you take a picture of Spencer holding the speculum?”

[Pacific Coast News]

Those are actually the classiest shorts in the entire line

In news that’s sure to send ripples through strip club dressing rooms nationwide, Heidi Montag’s fashion line “Heidiwood” has been discontinued. Fox News says:

. . . Heidi Montag ’s collection “Heidiwood” has been discontinued. But apparently, it isn’t a reflection of poor sales, but that her parent retail company “Anchor Blue” is moving in a different direction and is expected to close around 40 stores across the U.S in the coming months. (Source)

See, the problem is all in the name of the brand. “Heidiwood” can be the name of any Norwegian furniture store. Throw a few bucks my way and I’ll give you a couple of ideas that will make you crap yourself, then crap on your loved ones. For example, what’s needed to keep the line going is a name that captures the true essence of Heidi Montag, like AttentionWhoreville, Twattytown, or Las Putas. That’s right, I got some Spanish for your ass.

[WENN]

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt leaving XIV restaurant in Hollywood (10/14)

See that car Heidi and Spencer are sitting in? See it? It’s a $400,000 Rolls Royce Phantom. It’s not a rental. From TMZ:

Heidi and Spencer showed up LC last night at her own party. You’ll recall LC just got a $118,000 Audi. The Hateables one-upped that by rolling up in a Rolls Royce Phantom. We did some checking and were told H/S really did buy the car for around $400,000. Apparently, Jesus loves 24″ inch rims. Chauffeur not included. (Source)

Sure a Rolls Royce is nice but I’m partial to my ‘83 Subaru BRAT. Boy does its engine purrrrrrr like a kitten. I have to carry a stick in the front seat to beat off all the women throwing panties at me . . . *sigh* . . . does anybody know if one of those sporks from KFC is sharp enough to cut through your carotid artery?

[BauerGriffinOnline, Flynet]

The Hills‘ Lo Bosworth at the Warren-Tricomi salon in Hollywood yesterday afternoon and Lauren Conrad’s fashion show last night

I know I posted that picture of Lo Bosworth (The Hills) earlier, but I thought I’d repost it side by side with an after pic to really drive home her homeliness. I swear to god if this was 1608 instead of 2008, if Lo walked into a salon looking like that (l), and left looking like that (r), her makeup artist would have been arrested and burned at the stake for practicing black magic.

[Splash News, WENN]

Lauren Conrad outside of Toast cafe in West Hollywood (10/8)

I guess Lauren Conrad bought a new Audi R8 or something. Pacific Coast News says she had it delivered to her house in Hollywood yesterday. The cost? $115,000. Of course. Of course Lauren Conrad can afford a $115,000 car. She earned that money through sweat and hard work. My favorite episode of The Hills is when she goes to lunch with her friends and they talk about boys. No one goes to lunch with her friends and talks about boys as well as Lauren.

By chance, does anybody here know the president of MTV? If so, can you do me a favor and tell him to fuck off.

NOTE: 12 more Lauren Conrad pics on PAGE 2 (CLICK HERE)

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Audrina Patridge leaving Lauren Conrad’s house in Hollywood (9/18)

If you hate anything and everything having to do with The Hills, you may want to skip this story. From the New York Post:

When the blank-faced star of “The Hills,” Audrina Patridge , showed up to the Passion for Pink luncheon at a private home in Beverly Hills last week, she was gifted with a $22,000 diamond Igal Haimov watch. Sources said Patridge, not known for her sense of expression, “was speechless.” Source)>

Considering what a worthless no-talent Audrina is, she better keep that watch in a safe place. Because three years from now when The Hills has been canceled, her implants begin to leak saline, and the luster on her veneers starts to fade, she’s probably going to have to hock that thing for Top Ramen money. Something else I predict she’ll be selling in the near future to pay her grocery bills: Her ass.*

*I was gonna say home loans but that’s way too embarrassing.

[Flynet]

Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag at The Mission in Downtown L.A. (9/24)

I’m mildly surprised they’re not doing something inappropriate like making out. Actually, I can’t see Heidi’s right arm. Ten bucks she’s giving Spencer a hand job under that apron.

[Pacific Coast News]

Audrina Patridge’s new Hollywood Hill’ home

The Hills‘ Audrina Patridge is the proud new owner of a 3 bedroom, 2 bath home in the Hollywood Hills. Audrina is the second Hills “actress” to buy a million dollar home. Earlier this year, Lauren Conrad bought a Spanish-style home off of Los Angeles’ Sunset Strip for $2.36 million. The description of Audrina’s house from the listing:

This new construction Spanish Villa has a spectacular view over looking the city! It has 3 bedrooms & two and a half baths, & a huge gourmet chef’s kitchen. The kitchen features a separate convection oven, 6 burner gas stove, built-in microwave, wine refrigerator and side by side refrigerator, & a center island. The entertainer’s patio is like a resort w/ built in BBQ, refrigerator. (Source)

For all you haters out there, Audrina earned this house. I dare you to find someone in Hollywood who can pull off a better blank stare.

[Splash News, INFDaily.com]

The Beckhams have a nice home

David and Victoria Beckham’s $22 million home in Beverly Hills

NOTE: “. . . is better than you” is a Friday feature showcasing multi-million dollar celebrity homes in the hopes of generating feelings of jealousy, hatred, and animosity towards said celebrity. When you get down to the entertainment-dollar-spending core of it, you helped buy that home. Sucker!

[BauerGriffinOnline]