Heidi is just like Jesus
Heidi Montag’s struggle is just like that of Christ himself
Heidi Montag sat down for a little interview with USA Today over the weekend and, surprisingly, the sinner revealed she’s like way into God (”I have been the most religious person since I was 2 years old. I always felt this crazy connection to God.”) — so into God that she wants to record a Christian album in the future (I will take a cheese grater to my ears before I ever listen to that piece of crap). When asked about the rumored existence of a sex tape featuring her Hills costar Lauren Conrad, Heidi said:
“I don’t even want to talk about that. There were rumors about a sex tape, but I had nothing to do with that. God knows the truth in all of this, and at the end of the day, that is the only thing that matters. Jesus was persecuted, and I’m going to get persecuted, ya know? But it doesn’t matter to me.” (Source)
I hear you Heidi. Being nailed to a cross, magazines and websites gossiping about how you started a sex tape rumor, why it’s practically the same thing. A thousand years from now, I wouldn’t be surprised if Mel Gibson’s great great great great great great great great great grandson made a movie about your life and times. Passion of the Skank has a nice ring to it.
