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Paris Hilton arrived in Sydney, Australia yesterday where she"s set to host a New Year"s party and help judge a contest to find a new spokeswoman for the Australian beer Bondi Blonde. Upon arriving she hit up Bondi Beach (which the beer is named after) and did her usual thing. Which means taking something normal like showering at the beach and making it as super pornographic as possible. Paris"s best friend Kim Kardashian tagged along - because you can do shit like that when you don"t have a job - and apparently the two of them decided to compete for the title of Shiniest Purse Ever. Which is neat, because I"ve been saying for years that they should start making purses out of mirrors. That or human skin. You know, whichever is easier for the underage children to stitch together. A ton more of Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian at Bondi Beach after the jump.

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If my stomach looked like Tara Reid"s I don"t think I"d be doing the A-OK sign. I"d probably be giving two thumbs down. Or clutching my belly. Or crying. But A-OK? No, that"s not appropriate at all. It"s like yelling "hip, hip, hooray" at a funeral. More shots of Tara Reid in her bikini at St. Barts after the jump. But why do that to yourself? Aren"t there some burn victims you"d rather be masturbating to?

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Every time I visit Rosie O"Donnell"s site I want to drive a screwdriver through my her head. Donald Trump recently called in an interview on Larry King (above and after the jump) and in response Rosie writes on her blog:

so what happens
when u say the emperor has no clothes
the comb over goes ballistic
via phone to mr king

choices every minute every day everyone i imagine it is interesting as celeb feuds tend 2 b so here r my thoughts didnt watch didnt u tube restrict i have no time 2 make art now i am only off friday which is never enuf to detox the pipes get full bits of sludge clog the flow so tiny books now express in torn images my inside i was raised reading ms magazine i remember the burning of bras as women demanded equality in unison beauty pageants where women were paraded around judged valuable or not by old white men it is always old white men they added a talent portion and gave away college degrees they evolved - beauty pageants and eventually - nearly faded away for good remember the seventies a young girl in nyc meets a pimp he cons her into a life of illusion she works for him no fun - no fucking - no future she is owned when she sneaks out - to party the night away he freaks he roughs her up a bit shames her in front of the others teaches her to behave for his own benefit and just when we lost all hope cagney and lacey showed up they cuff the pimp they free the girl marybeth and christine would never be friends with a pimp this is reality tv like it or not same same same as vivi says

Only six year olds should be allowed to write like this. Or people in wheelchairs. And I"m not sure what she means by "i have no time 2 make art now." Judging by her "poetry" the only art she"s capable of making is finger paintings. And maybe that turkey where you trace your hand and draw little eyes and a feet on it. Part two of Donald Trump"s interview with Larry King after the jump.

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Lindsay Lohan spent three hours at Scores West yesterday, pole dancing with the strippers and even gathering them into the bathroom to apologize for recently calling them all "whores."

"I love strippers," the 20-year-old actress gushed as she entered the famed mammary mecca at 12:30 a.m., and launched into a half-hour deejay shift during the club"s "Turntable Tuesdays." Next, "She got up on the stripper pole and began to dance with the Scores Girls with 400 customers cheering her on," said our source. "Then, she joined her entourage of 15 in the VIP area, and got lap dances from many of the girls, including a special double-dance from two strippers at once. "It was hot. But while everybody was drinking, Lindsay was not. It was strictly Perrier for her."

How could anybody believe that Linday Lohan actually thinks strippers are whores? It"d be like Hitler thinking telemarketers are douchebags. I mean, yeah, sure, they"re kind of douchebaggy. But compared to Hitler they might as well be Jesus.

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Tara Conner Familiar With Rehab (A Socialite’s Life)
Classic Pamela Anderson Panty Pics (Egotastic!)

Britney’s Fan Site Closes Down (Pink Is The New Blog)
Kim Kardashian Might Be a Porn Star (IDLYITW)

Tara Reid’s Next Big Move: Big Brother? (Dlisted)
Meg Ryan Needs A Bra (Hollywood Rag)

Eva Speaks The Language of Love (Popsugar)
Beyonce Reigns Supreme (Just Jared)

Keith Urban Or Billy Ray Cyrus? (City Rag)
Random Hot Chick Of The Day (The Bastardly)

Tia Texada Doesn’t Need Handcuffs (Popoholic)
David Blaine Soda Can Trick Explained (HornyOyster)

Hollywood Tuna’s Back Catalogue
Victoria Beckham’s Nipples Are Interfering With My Xmas Plans
Can We Have The Playboy Version Of Cindy Margolis Back Please?
Adriana Lima’s One Piece Dress Is One Piece Too Many

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It’s always easy to spot celebrities. Just looks for the largest, most ridiculous pair of overpriced sunglasses, and there you go. Which brings me to Paris Hilton, seen here hanging out at Bondi Beach in Australia with her friend Kim Kardashian. Is it me, or is does it look like she’s posing for the paparazzi while showering? It’s like she has no concept of how real people are supposed to act in public.

Anyway, I’ve actually been to that beach when I visited Sydney a few years back, and let me tell you those waves were pretty powerful. I remember getting thrown around like a rag doll in the surf. I hope that Paris met the same fate when she had a dip. Why not? We’d all like to see her get a good spanking, but she’s too old for that now, so hopefully nature can do the job for us.

Related Articles:
Paris Hilton Bikini Pictures
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Paris Hilton Takes Sisterly Love To A New Low

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Paris Hilton arrived in Sydney, Australia yesterday where she"s set to host a New Year"s party and help judge a contest to find a new spokeswoman for the Australian beer Bondi Blonde. Upon arriving she hit up Bondi Beach (which the beer is named after) and did her usual thing. Which means taking something normal like showering at the beach and making it as super pornographic as possible. Paris"s best friend Kim Kardashian tagged along - because you can do shit like that when you don"t have a job - and apparently the two of them decided to compete for the title of Shiniest Purse Ever. Which is neat, because I"ve been saying for years that they should start making purses out of mirrors. That or human skin. You know, whichever is easier for the underage children to stitch together. A ton more of Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian at Bondi Beach after the jump.

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Here’s self proclaimed “bad girl of pop” and Dancing With The Stars contestant Willa Ford. I’m not sure what kind of pop music she’s referring to because I had no idea she even had a singing career. Anyway, these pics of her in Maxim prove that a nice singing voice and sweet dance moves aren’t her only talents – just ask her hockey playing fiancé, Mike Modano. Nice job Mike! And who said hockey players were stupid?

Willa Ford Maxim Video

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Willa Ford “The Bad Girl Of Pop” Or Just Plain Bad?
Denise Richards Pumps It
What Happened To Krista Allen?

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