Ah! This is how I like to see Avril Lavigne. Not all drunk and passed out like she was the other week. If you’re wondering where these pictures came from, they’re from Avril’s Ford modeling agency card. Now I think Avril is hot and all but isn’t she a little too short to be a model? Sure she’s famous but we need to set standards when it comes to modeling. Otherwise, young teenage girls will have false hope. So girls, even though Avril Lavigne is 5-foot nothing, that doesn’t mean you can be a model too. You can be an amateur Internet model but not a model model.
It’s quite funny seeing Pamela Anderson trying to hide herself from the paparazzi. As if we wouldn’t know who the girl will the big fake breasts and slutty attire is. Anyway, I think Pamela has faced enough ridicule over her implants and her misplaced nipples. However, the more I think about Pamela and her boobs, the more I don’t think this was a bad boob job. I think she purposely wanted her nipples way up to the right just so she can show off more of her cartoon-like cleavage. Now this is just my theory but I honestly can’t think of any other logical explanation.
TMZ has obtained a copy of Suri Cruise”s birth certificate which wasn”t filed with the Los Angeles County Clerk until May 8th even though Suri was born on April 18. They also point out some interesting notes about the certificate, like that the “Attendant or Certifier” wasn”t in the room during the delivery and never saw the baby, although she was authorized to sign because the doctor wasn”t available. Additionally, St. John”s Hospital filed the certificate 20 days after the birth as opposed to their usual policy of doing it within 10 days because they needed a signature from the parents or their representative and nobody came in until May 4th. The person who eventually signed was labeled “friend” and the reason they finally came in was because Suri needed a passport and a birth certificate is a prerequisite for one.
I”ve got a birth certificate for Mickey Mouse I threw together in Photoshop but I”m pretty sure that doesn”t prove he exists. There”s something very fishy going on with this child and it”s up to me and my group of rambunctious sidekicks to figure out what.
Lindsay Lohan was spotted in another new bikini with her boyfriend, who is apparently the strongest man in the world. It”s hard to tell but it looks like the guy is curling her with one arm. Which is the same approach I go for when impressing the ladies, only sometimes I mix it up with ripping a telephone book in half or bending a wrench into a pretzel.
More of Lindsay Lohan and her new green bikini after the jump.
In the last week, Lindsay Lohan has been living in a bikini and I’m getting a little tired of it. Frankly, the more I see her in a bikini, the less I think she belongs in one. So just to have fun and put a little perspective on things, I wanted to compare her against 43-year-old Marla Maples, better known as Donald Trump’s ex-wife. Lindsay wins but not not by much. Next: Lindsay Lohan Vs. Petra Nemcova… in which Lindsay has no chance in hell.
I’m dying to see Victoria Beckham nude. The girl won’t let up. She’s constantly teasing me by walking around in bras, little jean shorts, tight tops and it’s driving me nuts because I can’t pay to see the rest when normally I can for about 10 dollars. Now I know some of you like Victoria Beckham and some of you don’t. However, one thing we can all agree on is that she has no business outside the strip club.